Well I’m back again for another blog J. I might be a day behind but that was only because I fell asleep, probably Rob boring me to sleep with that Big Brother shiz lol. Totally ain’t interested. Its currently 02:03 am, would have liked to started on this a lot earlier but I coldn’t resist talking to my dear mate Sophie Denton along with a few other people. Which I kinda guess brings me to this posts topic. The last entry I posted was I guess a bit negative and did upset a few people who have read it and I guess this ain’t going to be the same LOL, since I would like to talk about my college life.
In a couple of weeks it will basically be an entire year since I had left my secondary school (Shirley High School) I cant be asked to put the whole performing arts status thingy in lol that’s a bit too much, leaving school with a new start ahead of me sounded great, must admit it was worrying to move to a new college not knowing anyone and basically leaving all you friends behind. I mean you always hear the same old story – “we’ll stay in contact forever and ever”, but the fact is after this year you see maybe your parents were right in saying you wont keep in contact forever, and to an extent it depresses me a bit. Just for the fact of not being able to see some of my closest mates everyday and however sad it sounds hearing their voice everyday. Its just one of them things that does get to me, considering how close we all used to be leaving school and all going our separate ways is really what’s happened here. Now I’m lucky to hear from a majority of my old mates from school you get the occasional message thanks to places such as Facebook, MySpace and msn but its never the same as being with that someone. For me someone who works as well I find it hard to balance everything out with everyone just due to the fact I work weekends for the money which leaves only a couple of the weekdays available to go out but because everyone has got school or college still they got to keep up with their work, its just almost impossible to meet up properly like old times L.
Moving back to college life for a while, well to be honest it SUCKS! I mean don’t get me wrong I’ve made some amazing friends people like I have mentioned in my previous post, but its not the same. Not to mention the one thing going through my mind all the time is just college is nothing but a 2 year course and with one year practically out the way already its just one more then yet again its goodbye to you all and a new start all over again. L By now I’m sure anyone reading or following my blog is like what on earth is this the most depressed and negative person in the world, and to an extent I could agree but I would like to say I am a happy person most of the time lolz I do have my moments but just in my mind I cant help think about these things. Not to mention I’m just an unfortunate person who happened to get into a lot of crap.
Yesterday morning it would be I had one of them moments at college where to be honest I’ve kinda said to myself I’m fed up with it all. To be more precise I was fed up with one individual, a teacher at my college who I did snap at because it was uncalled for. People who was there will know who I'm referring to but I wish to withhold the name just so incase someone comes across and reads this then decides to be like “OMG I cant believe that guy” and prints it off to show to that certain teacher then I get pulled in or just another argument in our college escalates and we get to have another joyous mothers meeting all targeted at our so called group of friends. I’m not intending to offend anyone here. But sorry it is kinda pathetic how I am writing this having to emphasize the point I have no freedom of speech anymore all because some people have a few issues with to be honest sometimes something that isn’t any of their business. Anyways going back to the debate of this morning I found it out of order to being called pathetic and told that our attitudes stank and basically told to pack our bags and just walk out of the college. At that moment I did stick up for myself maybe not in the right way of doing so me in my sarcastic mood of course but it was out of order. I admit I'm not always right but I wasn’t wrong this time because that teacher is, is a big fat liar. In fact it’s not just him, the whole college is just one massive scam to get your money. This morning I refuse to be told that I was wrong for saying that recording without a tri-pod would be stupid having it all handheld JUST due to the fact we was told as a rule “SMALL MOVEMENTS ON A SMALL SCREEN MIGHT NOT LOOK MUCH BUT ON THE BIG SCREEN THEY’RE HIGHLY NOTICALBLE” so I'm sorry I refused to film without a tripod due to the fact its what they taught us in the first place and it is right. No bloody show records an interview or therapy session with a handheld camera. I mean what would Sir Allan Sugar think if he was having his TV show filmed from a handheld camera. To be honest it wouldn’t happen.
Going back to the whole college is a scam what else is there to say other than it’s true. Beginning of the year we had to pay a £30 equipment fee well some sort of COMPULSORY fee, which was to go on equipment for us apparently. Well I'm sorry but why do I then still have to pay outrageous prices for a stupid DVD or CD or tape for our coursework. It’s ridiculous because where is this money they have taken off us going? Not to mention the fact that I'm having to pay £310 bloody pounds on a tripod that yes I admit I broke by accident but what happened to a thing called insurance. How can they justify me having to pay for a brand new state of the art tripod to replace some crappy one they bought years and years ago that everyone had been complaining about because it was faulty to begin with? While talking about faulty equipment that was the reason we couldn’t film the other week that bought on the argument I spoke of earlier, all because they gave us FAULTY equipment. I would also like to add and I don’t mind saying this to everyone because I mean it, the college isn’t getting one more penny of me after this tripod. They want me to pay for an item that is nothing but a lie, my name wasn’t signed to the item and I never lost it, on top of that it wasn’t even signed out correctly and therefore someone else got the blame. Therefore as a result because that same teacher is taking the piss he wants everyone in our group to pay for it and I would like to state here right now take me to court and I wouldn’t care the college said they would if they don’t get money so my answer is only TRY ME because I’m refusing to pay a single penny for something I have no attachment to.
Once again I have to cover myself because I cant mention names incase one sad person reports this because I make it personal against SOMEONE NAMED, but what I'm about to say is true. I'm being forced to pay for this tri-pod which I have to accept though I’m tempted to just say F*** it I'm gone and leave the college but someone else had broken another item of equipment, but like a few other things they’ve gotten away with it, I'm sorry after I've had letters sent home phone calls made as well as non stop harassment over it this other person has gotten away with no warnings or words of warning for breaking an item. Corrupted or what. BY THE WAY I was told they hadn’t heard from the college by their OWN mouth.
So much more I could bitch about college but I think I have made my point but please people don’t be all pissy about this and be like oh its out of order what I'm saying and its so obvious who I’m directing this at etc, because I am fed up with it. Its just pathetic how everyone’s freedom of speech has been taken away, but I am who I am and my views are MY views.
I guess I might cut it short here tonight but before I go I would just like to talk about one last thing before I go… and that is about my friends, I really would like to thank you all for being there for me and I know that things have become difficult due to college and everything but to everyone of my friends I would like to say you are dearly missed including some people from out of college some that meant a lot to me, life for us will never be over because you will all forever remain in my heart with the great memories we shared together. I love you all xxx
If only I cold turn back the hands of time I would just to spend another moment of my life with you.
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